ex-millennial girl

Drugs, Sex & Blood

Leila hadn’t called for over twenty four hours. I sat with my Russian roommates in their living room. We watched TV, wrapped ourselves in blankets, shivered, shat, and tried to find comfort in anything.

“Fuck, why doesn’t she call?” Ollie yelled, calling her beeper number for the hundredth time. I knew what he was hearing – “The number you are calling, has been disconnected, or is no longer in service…”

Tanya and I winced.

We were doing shots of cheap Mexican liquor and chewing Tylenol III with codeine.

“You know, I almost feel okay,” I told them. They nodded slightly.

Just then, my personal phone rang. It was Michele.

“Michele!”

“Baby, it’s okay. It’s okay.”

“No it’s not!”

“I’m getting sick just like you are. But me and Jerry are on our way to your place. It’s gonna be okay, he’s gonna help us.”

“But HOW?”

“We’re almost there. Just hang on. And don’t tell your fucking roommates! Are they right there?”

“Yes.”

Fifteen minutes later, the buzzer rang. I buzzed them into the building. I told Jerry to wait in the hall, ushering Michele through the door. Michele grabbed my arm and dragged me to my room.

“Why are you making him stand out there?!” she raged.

“Look at my room! It’s a mess!”

There was trash everywhere at least a foot deep, the product of junkie life. Nowhere to stand, even.

“You let him in here! He’s helping us! Let him in right now or I’m leaving!!!”

“No!” I was too ashamed. It was self explanatory – the place was a dump. I didn’t know why she was focusing on the issue so tenaciously.

“Fucking Stef!” She ran out and came back with Jerry, dragging him by his coat. He looked embarrassed for me. “It’s okay, I can wait in the hall,” he mumbled.

“No! I won’t let this bitch be rude to you! Stef, get some clothes on, we have to go to my apartment. We have vodka and Kahlua for White Russians. You like White Russians, right baby?” she asked me, smoothing my hair down. I was so embarrassed, I'd begun to cry soundlessly, my face grimacing, twisted up. I barely managed a nod.

“So okay. You get dressed and we’ll fix you up.”

“HOW?”

“Shut up! Don’t tell your roommates!”

“But how?”

“Leila had to change her beeper number. I have it.”

For the first time, there was hope. I gasped.

“Yeah, that’s right. She’s in Philly until ten. That’s two hours. We’ll be at my place for two hours and then she’ll deliver. Jerry’s buying us four bags.”

Still crying, I looked at Jerry for confirmation. He looked away from my face, and the mounds of trash, and nodded. Finally, he actually requested to wait out in the hall. Michele let him.

“How could you do that to him! Making him wait in the hall. You’re lucky I’m such a good friend, Stef. But I’ll never forgive you for that!” she yelled as I hopped into the least dirty jeans I could find.

“Michele, you see this place! I didn’t want to gross him out! It’s embarrassing!”

“Still. C’mon, hurry.”

We left. I told Tanya and Ollie that we were going to get drunk at Michele’s. They believed me, of course, after they asked Michele if she had any opium.

“Sorry, guys. I’m as fucked as you are. I’m just really drunk,” she told them. They gave her three Tylenol IIIs, which she gulped down immediately.

We got back to her empty loft and poured ourselves huge White Russians. My Tylenol IIIs were keeping me level, and the alcohol helped, too.

“Mm, I know, Stef.” Michele said theatrically as she and Jerry sat on her loveseat. “Let’s have a threesome.”

I rolled my eyes. “I’m going out on your fire escape for a cigarette.” I stood out there smoking, feeling the rush of excitement. The opium was coming. It was!

I walked back into the loft, to a slightly metallic smell and strange sounds.

“Uh! Uh!” Michele yelped. She was riding him on a kitchen chair. They were fucking in full swing, bobbing up and down, their organs grinding in full view. “Yes! Fuck me, fuck me!”

“Whatever,” I said softly and walked quickly into Michele’s bedroom, shutting the door.

The door opened soon enough, and Michele poked her head in. “Steffy, don’t you want to see his big cock fuck my pussy?” she asked, hurt.

I was always bothered by Michele’s sexuality. Her sex was like her drug abuse – obnoxious, too conspicuous, greedy, and always taking advantage of the other person. She liked to degrade her partners. Sometimes I was one of them.

When I didn’t say anything, she moved into the room. She laid flat on the loveseat cushion, her pussy sat out, elevated. “Come fuck me in here, Jerry.”

Jerry looked at me quickly, his pants still down and his dick still hard. Yes, it was big, like over eight inches. I could not have looked more bored.

He go on his knees in front of her and she spread her legs to let him in. That’s when I realized where the metallic smell was coming from – Michele was bleeding heavily, on her period.

“Oh come on Michele,” and I started to leave.

“No! Stay! I want you to watch!” she cooed, but it was more whining than cooing.

I stood there and looked at the photos on her wall.

“Watch, Stef! Watch his cock go in my pussy!”

It wasn’t easy. The blood had dried, become hard. His stabbing dick wasn’t going in at all. Michele spit a loogy into her palm and rubbed herself. “There.”

“Eww,” I said.

“Watch!” she yelled at me, cruelly. “Watch him fuck me!”

Jerry looked into my eyes and saw just how much I loathed being there. “Michele, she doesn’t want to be –”

“Shut up! Shut up and fuck me with your big fucking cock!”

This time, it went in.

“Oooh, ooooh-yeahhhhh” said the bad porn actress. “Oooh, Stef are you watching this? Yeahhhh.”

It looked very painful. Dried blood clumps went in and out along with his dick, which went in at an awkward angle. Michele was lying. I knew it hurt.

“This is ridiculous!” I yelled.

“Stop trying to ruin my good time!! I want to get fucked by my boyfriend and I want my pretty girlfriend to watch! What’s wrong with that?”

The way she said it, I actually felt guilty for a second.

“Ohh, I love you watching me, Stef. I love his cock, don’t you love watching his cock? Isn’t it huuuuge? Stef, isn’t it?”

Jerry looked up for my answer.

“Um-hmm.” I said.

“Fuck yeah fuck me so hard fuck me hard fuck it fuck that pussy so hard-”

“Dammit Michele will you just shut up and get fucked? I need to take a shit,” I said, and stormed out. I stayed in the bathroom for as long as I could. When I came out, they sat in her bedroom fully dressed. Michele glared at me, but somehow the whole subject was dropped.

The only person who “came” was Leila, and that’s all that mattered. Leila called Tanya and Ollie from Michele’s place and gave them her new beeper number. Michele told Leila not to mention she’d seen us that night. While Leila talked to the Russians, we could hear them yelling for joy.

“Those roommates of yours are pretty crazy,” Leila told me. “But I kinda like ‘em.”

“Me too,” I said.

posted by Stefanie at 9/16/2006 03:35:00 PM